"I've always said that in COMPETITION, your enemies can't hurt you, but your friends(SO CALLED) will kill you."
~Ann Richards
What are SO CALLED friends?
They are people that you think are your friends But they're really your enemies, with secret indentities and disguises, to hide they're true colors So just when you think you're close enough to be Sisters they wanna come back and cut your throat when you ain't lookin.
When all is said and done, friendship is the only trustworthy fabric of the affections. So-called love is a delirious inhuman state of mind: when hot it substitutes indulgence for fair play; when cold it is cruel, but friendship is warmth in cold, firm ground in a bog.Friends.....a very soothing word indeed,but adding an adjective to it, makes it the most bitchy word around... and that adjective is SO CALLED.....making it something like SO CALLED FRIENDS...they r ppl who try to heal ur wounds by craving them....they r those who pretend that they r ur best wellsishers,ur best friends,ur sympathizer,comforter but in actuall they r the crappiest thing around....they will screw u like anything and still pretend to be ur best budies.....by doing so they think they r KOOL DUDES!!!!
DUHHH!!!!
They actually are losers. By these deeds they want to cater with some complex inside them....they want to adjust things by screwing others.....they make fun of others and think they have achieved something. Confidence in an unfaithful Friend in time of trouble is like a broken tooth, and a foot out of joint. What we learn only through the ears makes less impression upon our minds than what is presented to the trustworthy eye.Remember! A true friend never breaches the trust of his companion or stabs in his back. He is trustworthy and reliable.
One should therefore always try to be a true and reliable friend.The past few days have been something of reflective to me. I just wonder, why am I still alive? Its perhaps God's grace...m still alive *Shrugs* . During this time i have added a new lesson to my life: Never give yourself to anyone. Never trust anyone more that you should. Why?
Well, just to put in lightly, people only notice you when you have something to give. But when they're done with you, they would leave you behind. Like a broken toy. And when that happens, you're left alone. No one is there for you. Only you. Yourself. I won't go into details, but let me just say that a few good people had to suffer for one man's treachery. If I cannot trust anyone anymore, who am I left to trust?
No one. Perhaps only God and I and my BEST FRIENDS.
But other than that.
No one!
24 comments:
" apnay mun main doob kur paa ja suragh-e-zindagi,
tu agar mera nahin bunta, na bun ! apna tau bun ! "
~Iqbal
:P
In God we trust, rest we virus scan.
As life goes on, keep updating the anti-virus :)and keep an open heart.
and they say....
"WHAT GOES AROUND COMES BACK AROUN"
following this proverb....do we need to pay dat person back in his own coins??
Yeah its something which is our self and our societies still we don't talk much about it. "We are not sincere with our self how can we be sincere with others"
I was reading a comment from syra "In God we trust..." I think we don't trust in GOD as well , we are king and queens of our life , we just think we trust in GOD , WE DON’T MEAN IT .we don't trust any one and sometimes we don't trust our self
The key is to get to know people and trust them to be who they are. Instead, we trust people to be who we want them to be- and when they're not, we cry.We shudnt not dig up the tree to examine his roots. Trust in GOD at first place and then urself....we shudnt expect anything from nyone..in other words shudnt blindly trust nyone....because before trusting he may be someone very dear to u but after u trust someone and he somehow shatters it.....u will loose a good UN-TRUSTWORTHY person...lolzzz....my point is trust is like a vase.. once it's broken, though you can fix it the vase will never be same again.
Yupe, most of us become depressed and disheartened during difficult times in life.I guess it's natural to be sad but When things don't go the way we want them to that is the point of our test of trust in Allah. We should be honest and sincere in terms of anything and everything and leave things to Allah knowing that which ever way things turn out will be indeed best for us.
When somebody betrays\hurts us it doesn't give us the license to hurt them back. In my view the best approach would be to confront them in a good humble way, talk about the issue and eventually forgive them without holding any grudges at heart.(easier said then done =) )
LOLZZzzzz.....
Seriously....Easier said then Done...
At times like these its very natural to get extremley caught up in our hurt and curse the other person, feeling pity for ownselves. But we tend to ignore the fact that such times give us a chance to contemplate! We should first try questioning ourselves if we ever were a cause of the same hurt/wrong to somebody;
You never know when your own bad might be coming back to you. The other person whos breaking our trust might actually be completely unaware of it and the probability of us having done the same thing, unknowingly is very high too!
So what should be done ?
I think:
firstly, make a list of people whom you think you might have hurt, are angry to you, or arent speaking to you, and apologise to them. In that process, finding out how some people might still be angry at you can come as a shocker too ! :)
2ndly,prayer! pray that god helps you identify your own wrongdoings that might have caused miseries to others, and that god helps you reach/find them and apologise to all of them.
Not just apologise but mend things and make it up to them. And pray that God makes your apologies acceptable to the ones you might have hurt !
And for the person who hurt you, pray that they realise their fault, that they get hadayat and you be able to forgive them. Forgiveness if we can comprehend, is better and needed more for our own peace than the one whom we feel should be asking for it !
Also i think when people hurt you, always make sure that they get to know how they've hurt you ! why ? so that they become aware of the magnitude of their wrong and later in life when you hurt someone you get to know of your wrong too !
:)
I agree to every bit of Saira's comment. JazakAllah khyar for such a wonderful comment.
well said Saira....
i agree to what u said...but my point is..forgiving people is indeed a great deed, the tough thing about it is, u really really need guts to do dat...and again it depends upon the MASS of the hurt u got..
We've been making decisions about trust from the beginnings of our consciousness. Few of us can remember, but at one time we were all trusting of just about everyone. As we aged, we experienced both trust and its opposites, abuse and betrayal. Our human databank of knowledge increased tremendously. Some experiences were good, others bad. As these experiences multiplied, we began to shape our view of trust and mistrust......and my view of TRUST was, people who love u,care for u, know u...and support u during ur weak hours.....can never break ur trust...but this is not the case everytime...
ofcourse things saira mentioned,greatly help ur ownself in a way...but for that matter u need to be great urself at first place and i am afraid im not....
I understand and agree with the idea that forgiving others is more about your peace of mind then it is about their feelings.First two things dat u mentioned...yeah awesome..everyone shuold do dat ....but the last thing.....lolzzzz....depends upon the capacity of person getting hurt....
telling dat person about the thing wont help i think..because if he has done this to u.....he can do this to anyone...anytime...
How do you forgive someone who spread vicious and humiliating lies about you?
I really don't have a clue how you can truly forgive others for this. Maybe complete forgiveness is impossible in some cases. Maybe, sometimes, the hurt is so bad that the quality of your health and life will suffer for the rest of your life because you will always harbor some anger for the people who hurt you. may be at some point in time one wants to forgive the person....but when the wounds are fresh one can only curse him.... :)
in time you'll understand :)
Indeed, a big mighty heart is required to forgive another. Just do it to please Allah. :)
God loves those who forgive.
Personally speaking, If i see a sincerity in another's apology I would forgive instantly but then again like you said, it depends on how massive the hurt is. Sometimes an apology is not enough and sometimes you tend to forgive another with the passage of time.In any case we should keep an open heart at our ends and give the other a chance.
It's most painful when somebody who has earned your trust,love and care leaves you at a time when support is required, hurts you or breaks your trust. I doubt if somebody does that unintentionally or doesn't realize the wrong doing. How can somebody be so insensitive. In most cases, people become selfish or coward out, or leak secrets for the sake of gossiping and that is the point when another's true face is revealed. It's like they are hurting you and they know it yet continue to do so.
Monay,It's natural to feel anger initially, but I am sure, if the person who spread vicious lies about you realizes his\her wrong doing, comes to you, genuinely apologizes and makes it up to you by perhaps telling all those ppl to whom he\she lied too that there is no truth in what he\she said abt you, you will forgive :)InshahAllah.
yeah i will...but only if she realizes her sin herself :)
hamaray kuch kahay baghair hee dosra insaan apnee ghaltee waqt par samajh jayay tau iss say achee baat kya ho saktee hai.
then one should forgive instantly.
some ppl destroy another's life, and only realize their wrong doing when they are on the dead bed, they want to reach out to the person they hurt and ask for their forgiveness, but are unable to. That is such a scary death and a punishment from Allah in itself.
My mom always says, if you are good to another, you will feel good about your self, and if you do bad to another it will come back to you in a greater magnitude sooner or later.
makes me wonder why does the bad happen when we didn't cause any..but as they say...everything happens for the better =)
*death bed ( in their last days)
I have two attachments back in Pakistan, my mother’s family and then memoona: P She is very nice, caring and down to earth person. She is too cool to bluff.
Having said that now come to the topic: P
Such sort of things can be done by someone who has the brain size of chimpanse. Its nice to stop all social contacts with such kind of person and one should not give the second chance to a “B(i)tch . If she bites you once , then definitely she is gonna bite you again.
I would recommend you the following solution .
1 = add a folder on desktop “Friends” and add all yours Tina ,mina type and don’t forget to add I.Z.Bhutto and ladoo lover :)
2 = Right click on folder and choose “delete” .
3 = when you get prompt “do you want to send your all “friends “ to the recycle bin . Choose YES.
PS” if Isba and Sairaandeelbs ever encounter this topic .
“when someone else write in topic , you let them to write and my comments are always subject to approval and they never appear in the post. . That’s what we call “lack of character”. If you ever want to judge the character of someone give him/her power. I do understand that the Girls are scarce resource in Pakistan and no matter how ugly they are, they will be having the fan club , so enjoy the replies of your feet licker friends :P
;)
well i never comment on blogs as often.... but Aamir ive certainly without a doubt have bcome fan of ur replies!!!
Go Ahead Brother!!!
:P nO OffEnCe :P
lolzzz!
hahahahaha !!!!
Teeba Behan
sada jeeti raho app , allah app ko khush aur abaad rake (ameen).
Frankly speaking main apni babe ka kafi ladla putter houn and I try not to hit below the belt but sometimes we need to cut the cartoon to their size. Look at the fake laughter of Saira , first she pressed "h" few times on her keyboard and in order to support the “h” she added lolz. God knows the level of insanity inside her:=).
why do you not put some wisdom inside the head of Saira and I.Z.Bhutto? How long they are going to subscribe this
" Growing old is mandatory but growing up is optional “
Mona
you do not need to worry as long as "main houn na" (wink).
on valentine day , send this to your puppet friends.
Tere ishq ki inteha chahti houn..
Meri saadgi daikh main kya chahti hun.
CHILLAXX Dudes!!!!!
i just put this topic on to speak my heart out...what i was feeling and what i am feeling.....what happens when a trust shatters and what do u feel while deciding abt forgiving someone.....i agree to all of u...Saira, Syra..Sir Haseeb.....Teeba(irrelevant :P) and ofcourse my friend Aamir.....
Aamit...stick to the topic friend...share ur views about friends Breaking TRUST.... :)
AAMIR......i will feel really pleased if u will delete ur comments abt my friends urself.... just talk about the topic...u can find a battle field somewhere else...my blog is not the one....
I will write my own justification later today .
Meanwhile check your mail , i have sent you the scholarship application form for admission in Master.
Its better if you come here :=)
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